Girls Can’t Sing?

Please don’t hurt me… yes just take what ever you want!!!!

Never have I been more afraid listening to someone sing or baffled as to what is considered “good singing” or music. Where have all the good chick singers gone??

Today I’m specifically talking about “The Gossip” (there’s no way I’m embedding that video). Seriously who the fark is buying this shit?? In this two chord masterpiece and for that matter all the music I’ve unfortunately been ambushed to listen to (on the radio) from these chumps, I feel like I’m being smashed about the head with a trashcan lid.

Beth Ditto’s ghastly “vocal” excretes from my speakers like napalm infused projectile vomit. Now stop. I’m not having a go at this woman cause she is a big girl. I don’t know the first thing  about her either – other than I’m not sure if you’d be safer if she loved you or hated you?

Having to hear the supposed “sexy ones” like  Rhianna bandied around like they are musical goddesses brings me to even as much frustration.  Not to mention this ongoing “who can be the biggest slag” video clip competition that is all over MTV and Video Hits.

Amy Whinehouse, Lady Ga Ga, Gabriella Cilmi (was there ever a more manufactured “package”). Bloody lame arse cover song singer lets patronise the “american negro girl” Marsha Hines.  The fabularse bellowing “Bullshit Sisters” – aka Vicka and Linda Bull (black sorrows) Geeze and how could I forget that other perpetual nitro powered squarker Vanessa Amorosi (seriously your “showpiece” high notes are not cool the louder and more frequently you sing them). Perhaps chick singers are just shit!?

Lord please help female vocalists .. but there are some good ones…  somewhere.

Good Chick Singers:

Gwen Stefani
Sara Bareilles
the super talented Esperanza Spalding
Kate Miller-Heidke
Nicole Atkins
Katy Perry
Imelda May

and lets not forget, the greatest female vocalist and performer of all time.. PINK

 

3 comments

  1. whoa mate i think youve made a mistake… Gabriella Cilmi is the best singer ever.. and clearly my best friend

  2. ^ from bronwen

  3. i think you're a bit dizzy still from your new ear peircing!!?

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